A hypothetical investigation of the best way to steal my own art.
My first year in the Twin Cities, I found myself shacked up with three strange ladies. Platonically shacked, that is. Each room of our 4 bedroom flat painted a vibrant hue different from the room proceeding it. One green, one purple, one red, and one blue.
The house was mostly established when I came on board. Wrong verb, I should say inhabitated, not established. The curb furniture was aplenty but the walls were barren.
A blank wall is my canvas.
With the help of the aging, crusty wall paint. I made four corresponding paintings. One in each bedroom tone. The joke was that they had to be random objects with no significance or reference to one another. We wanted visitors to wonder what the hell these paintings meant.
The strategy was effective. New comers and unobservant frequent travelers often asked what a red mousetrap, a blue fudgsicle, a green bowling pin and a purple bunny had in common.
Cue=>Laughter.
The ladies split up, the paintings scattered. The red canvas went to the red-room live-in. The bunny somehow ended in unrelated hands - just a friend that liked it. The green one went ignored in my possessions for years. The Fudgsicle to another friend who frequented frozen chocolaty conversation.
My dusty bowling pin didn't interest me in it's solitude, I forked it over to the bunny adopter.
Now we are at - 2 for friend A. 1 for Original red-room occupancy, & 1 for Friend B.
The red mousetrap lives in oblivion in Madison, WI. Likely stacked in neglected belongings that didn't make the cut to New York, New York.
The blue fudgsicle lays somewhere unseen in Friend B's long time home.
The green bowling pin and the purple bunny have led happier lives. They have been hung and displayed proudly since their acceptance. In fact, Friend A moved to New York by plane under luggage restrictions. There were a meager amount of belongings that traveled across the United States. My paintings were two of those things.
Through wildly entertaining, sincerely endearing and slovenly drunken texts - I am asked to track down the other two neglected images.
Moral art dilemma.
There are people that pretend to appreciate art and there are people that appreciate art. Just as there are people that appreciate the effort someone puts into something and there are some that pretend to appreciate the effort someone puts into something.
My point is... the love factor can either lead a person to displaying your work proudly or letting it lay is closets and uninhabited cities.
This is not a diss on either of those owners. They both have other works of mine out for the public eye. (I just realized that brings my total to 5 of my paintings in New York City, I'm claiming serious territory!). But for some reason, maybe it doesn't 'match' or 'fit' or they have no room to hang it... those sit neglected.
So how do I steal my own art back and put it to a loving home?
Frankly, I don't even like the paintings themselves. I liked the concept for the one year it hung in that four bedroom flat, but after that house split - so did my interest.
Can I ask for it back?
Do I have that right as an artist?
Do we get a say in our own art's destiny?
Can I intervene?
Would a bait and switch work here? Offer up a new work.
What is less offensive?
Is there really a way to tell someone they aren't doing your art justice and you want it back?
Is having them read this on a blog somewhere worse than just asking the stupid question? Ha.
Normally, I wouldn't care. Go ahead and rot, they already have for this long. But now I have someone knocking at my door. Begging me for the orphaned paintings.
Hmmm...
It just makes me consider this thing called art. I've always done it for me. Me only. I accumulate too much and gift it away to people that I feel would appreciate it. Maybe it's a silly thing to assume, that anyone would want these things. Artistic tastes vary through every one's mouth. How arrogant to assume I would taste good.
Hmmm...
It's too bad I'm broke again during the holiday season and have a million prints to give away. You will all love my work! You must!
I tried to find photo's of said paintings... but that was before my digital age. Apparently, the green bowling pin did make a breif appearence in my uptown studio. Don't follow my grandiose jesture... instead follow the ponytail to the upper left. All paintings where in that same style. Static objects.
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